I used to think I just had a discipline problem.
I could do hard things in every other area of life, but when it came to cravings and food, I’d fold pretty fast!
One minute I was committed, the next minute I’d be in the pantry with a handful of something I’d already told myself I wasn’t going to eat.
And it wasn’t about being hungry, not at all, it was like something inside me had not only taken the wheel, but had locked me in the boot and I was powerless to do anything until they’d had their fun and handed the keys back to me.
This is the part no one talks about, right? This is where our shame lives and we don’t want to admit it, but this inside battle, it's normal!
“Until you make the unconscious conscious,
it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”
Carl Jung
The Battle Within
As Jimmy Barnes said so beautifully in one of his songs, “You can’t win a fight you don’t understand.”
It took me 25 years to fully understand what th...
Still trying to lose weight?
It’s difficult to navigate the emotional and practical realities of changing long-held behaviours - and the resistance that comes with that change, both from others and from yourself.
It’s also difficult to comprehend how people often respond when you do, and why backslides happen.
This is deeply important to someone struggling with weight loss, health, and getting their life in order - because this is the missing piece most weight loss advice completely ignores.
Here’s what no one tells you about change (that you really need to know)
Real change isn’t about food. It’s about identity.
When we try to lose weight, we usually start by changing what we do — what we’re eating, our exercise routines, and our habits.
But we rarely expect the social resistance that shows up when we start changing who we are becoming.
Friends, family, co-workers - often unconsciously - pull you back into your old self.
Because that suits t...
The other day, I overheard someone say, “I just need to smash this next goal—and then I’ll figure out what’s next.”
It stuck with me, because I think that’s how most people live without realizing it. I certainly did!
Goal to goal. Hustle to hustle.
Like jumping between stepping stones without knowing where the path is actually heading.
And sure, it feels productive.
You’re ticking boxes and you’re moving.
But at some point, you look up and realize… you’re not actually getting anywhere you wanted to go.
The Truth About Goals (That No One Tells You)
Most of us set goals like putting pins in a map:
✔ Lose 5 kilos.
✔ Get the promotion.
✔ Save for a holiday.
But a map full of pins isn’t a plan, it’s not creating a vision.
It’s just a collection of isolated wins that don’t necessarily add up to the life you really want.
No wonder so many people feel restless even after they ‘achieve’ something.
If your goals aren’t conn...
I imagine you’ve felt this too, like there’s an invisible architecture running your life?
And it’s true, there actually is.
It’s a system that’s been quietly built over years: thought by thought, feeling by feeling, reaction by reaction.
What it is, is the behind-the-scenes blueprint of your habits:
That’s why, even with your very best of intentions, you find yourself slipping back into the same old habits:
But it’s not self-sabotage.
It’s an efficient system doing what it’s m...
Most people think changing a habit is about being stronger, trying harder or simply just sticking to the plan.
But what if the reason your bad habit keeps coming back isn’t because you’re weak, but it’s because your brain is efficient?
Habits are shortcuts. Once something becomes automatic, whether it’s overeating at night, scrolling when you’re stressed, or checking out emotionally when things get too much, it’s no longer a conscious decision. It’s a well-worn neural pathway doing what it’s always done: saving energy and avoiding discomfort.
You could say it’s your nervous system doing its job a little too well.
That’s why you can make a plan in the morning, then completely abandon it by afternoon.
It’s not because you lack discipline, but because you’re dealing with a system that defaults to the familiar when you’re under pressure, tired, distracted or simply just following the same routine of every day.
Why is it so hard to change, even when we kn...
I don’t know about you, but I didn’t imagine my life looking like burnout, broken sleep, or feeling snappy at the people I love.
That wasn’t part of the dream.
But for a while, that’s where I found myself.
Overworked and overwhelmed.
Still doing all the things, but not feeling much joy in any of it. Waking up each day in a body that didn’t feel good, living in a world full of people, yet feeling strangely alone.
And I remember thinking, how the heck did I get here?
I’d had a vision for my life, and had all the things I had set out to achieve, but I wasn’t feeling good and I was a long way from happy or satisfied and I didn’t understand why.
I thought about it for a long time before I realized that although I had been focused on achieving my goals, I had not been focused on anything else. I’d had a vision for my life and I’d mapped out what I wanted but not how I was going to get there and in what condition I’d be in when I arrived!
My life looked...
It was only one degree of course.
That’s all.
The pilot didn’t notice it at first.
The passengers didn’t feel it.
And for a while, the plane looked like it was still heading exactly where it was supposed to go. But after an hour? That one-degree shift put them kilometres away from their intended destination and put them squarely on a collision course with a mountainside!
That’s how life is too, right?
We don’t wake up one day suddenly exhausted, off-track, or feeling stuck. It happens gradually—one small decision, one habit, one compromise at a time.
We tell ourselves we’ll start tomorrow, that we’re just too busy this week, and when things settle down, then we’ll get back to our health, our goals, our bigger vision.
Except life doesn’t settle down, does it….not really?
And before we know it, we’re wondering how we ended up on a collision course with the mountain!
I know this pattern because I lived it, not just once, but many many ti...
With a cyclone heading toward Brisbane tomorrow, it’s one of those moments that makes you stop and think—what really matters?
When life throws uncertainty our way, we’re reminded that it’s not the things we’ve bought in a moment of retail therapy that we truly care about.
It’s our family, our loved ones, our home—the things that make us feel safe, grounded, and connected.
And yet, in everyday life, it’s so easy to get caught up in accumulating stuff—new clothes, gadgets, home décor, or another pair of shoes we don’t really need. But when we strip it all back, we see how little of it actually matters when faced with real challenges.
How Simplifying Life Strengthens Our Health & Well-Being
The truth is, life feels lighter when we’re not weighed down by clutter, financial stress, or by an over-packed schedule.
How does simplifying make our life easier and make us healthier?
1. It reduces stress.
Less financial pressure, fewer decisions, and a hom...
We all think we are in control of most things in our life don’t we?
But what we’re usually trying to control is the day to details of a stupidly busy hectic life.
We work hard at juggling our responsibilities, and push through exhaustion, but at some point, along the way we realise we have dropped off something – relationships, fun, health, rest, career, spirituality, community, finances or some unrealised dream and we do our best to change course and bring one or all of them back in.
But have you ever stopped to ask why any of those things are important to you?
What is it that you’re really chasing after?
I ask myself that question alllllll the time!
I get caught up in the doing "of things", the steps and tasks I need to accomplish to get to wherever it is I want to go.
Some of those steps have been exhausting, even painful, yet I’ve rarely stopped to check whether they were actually necessary. Or, more importantly, whether they were even lea...
I used to say, with pride, that I was driven to achieve—results-driven and driven to succeed, driven to lose weight, driven to get things done! But as it turned out, that was not a recipe for happy success.
When you’re driven, you’re the passenger right? At the mercy of where the driver wants to take you and how they want to drive!—Whether it’s slow as a snail or reckless and relentless, side-swiping everything in the way and leaving you arriving at your destination feeling like a wreck: weight and health issues, relationships in tatters, exhausted and unable to find the joy.
But when you’re the driver, you’re in control. Your hands are on the wheel, your feet are on the pedals, and you decide where you want to go. You can pull over for rest stops when you need them and take detours to explore the things that bring you joy.
Being driven means your internal forces are controlling your thoughts, feelings, and responses. It feels like you’re making the choices, but reall...
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